My dad developed dementia about 5 years ago.  It was a slow process but accelerated last year.  I would take my dad to the King Of Prussia Mall every weekend.  He loved walking around and seeing children with their parents. We would stop for coffee and have our talks.  I watched my dad decline each week last year.  I will never forget the day he looked at me and said, "Now tell me.  Who is your father?"  My heart sank to my chest as I knew this devastating disease was starting to control him.  The worst part was that he knew something was wrong.  He would say. "I am losing it."

My dad is in Sunrise Assisted Living in Haverford.  Unfortunately, he cannot walk, feed himself or speak.  Every so often we get something out of him and the excitement overwhelms us.  He looked right in my mom's eyes a couple of weeks ago and said "I love you."  As you can imagine, we all cried.  I know my dad would hate to live this way......being fed, wearing a diaper and having strangers care for him.  However, we are lucky to have him in a facility where he receives so much love and affection from his caretakers.   It helps my family and I as well.  They say this disease is harder on the families.  However, I have such a difficult time understanding how my dad lived a beautiful life and has no idea he lived it.  He is alive but not living.   His life has been erased from his memory as have all of us. However, we will always speak to him as if  he does know us.  We continue to kiss him and tell him how much we love him.  I miss him terribly.