My story of my father and his fight with Alzheimer's disease is one that lasted for nearly 15 years. He was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's disease in December 1995, even though he showed signs several years before.

Let me start this tribute to the man who gave me strength and taught me to never give up. Years ago when we would take walks together he would say to me as I was tiring out that "it was no hill for a climber". This stuck with me throughout the years as I watched him progress through the disease. He fought Alzheimer's disease to the end as if he climbed through it into heaven.

My father, Earl Epping, passed from this life April 24, 2008.   He was 89 years old and lived his last five years at the Missouri Veterans home in Mexico, MO. My name is Susan Epping. I was born and raised in Moberly, MO. I later moved to Tulsa, OK where I spent 20 years of my life. I moved back to Moberly in 1998 deciding that I wanted to be near my father so he would know me as long as he could. I want to share how all the phases of Alzheimer's happened and how I learned to accept each one, not easily, but it happened.

I remember the day he was diagnosed. I sat thinking what will I do when he no longer knows me? I quickly came to terms with that thought, realizing he was the one who would lose the memory, not me. I knew then that I must stand strong for him. I had heard how all the stages occur but really didn't think it would happen to dad.

After my move back to Moberly, my mother and I would attend Alzheimer's support groups to give and receive experience, strength and hope. My mother had a hard time in the beginning with denial, plus she had a hard time telling her friends about her husband, feeling she was betraying him in some way if she told anyone he had Alzheimer's. The meetings certainly helped her in that area. We experienced taking away his right to drive, which was one of the very hardest things for him to give up. For me, I felt very much like the bad guy taking away his keys. At that time I started taking him for drives up to Excello and Mt. Salem, some of his old stomping grounds when he was young. What a fun time we had together! In time he seemed to accept not driving and allowed mother or I to drive him. I learned to love him in every stage how ever long it would last. The Alzheimer's continued to take and take from him. As a daughter I had to help him in ways I never thought I could, like showering, dressing, and feeding him.

He was able to stay at home with my mother as long as he could but the time came when we needed more help. In March of 2003 he entered the Missouri Veterans Home. On that day my heart broke. I felt like I was giving my father away. He did seem to adjust more quickly than I and in time it became my weekly routine to pick up my mother and head for Mexico. In time he couldn't walk and ended up in the wheel chair and then came the gerry chair. We all did the best we could. On Sundays we all would attend church services in the chapel at the home and my father could sing the chorus of Jesus Loves Me up until several months before he died.  

I could go on and on about him but my purpose today it to encourage everyone who is going through this to enjoy your loved one as they are today and have acceptance. In the last few months of dad's life he couldn't communicate very well, however he would clap his hands when asked. When my mother would ask for a kiss, he would pucker his lips. He also would giggle everytime I would whisper in his ear "Dad, I love you!"
  
He had forgotten who I was many years before he passed but there were a few times when I would get on one knee and look straight in his eyes and actually get eye contact. He would reach out and touch my cheek and I knew he knew who I was. These times were very few but special, all the same.

This is my first Christmas without him and it is very hard. He loved Christmas. My memories of years past have him in his red vest ushering in the holidays. He loved the lights and always decorated the house inside and out. In the past few years I would decorate his room for him. I have never not had a father and I am having the hardest time accepting this. This is my hardest hill to climb. I know he is in heaven and I know he is better off. However, the truth is I dearly miss the little man who at the end would clap his hands, smile and would giggle when I said "I love you."

Here's to you, Earl Epping, the greatest man I have ever known. I miss you dearly and will never be the same without you in my life. Thank you for making me feel special. 

My dad loved his family and especially my mother Maurine. My hope is that research will find a cure for this horrible disease. I do believe in time it will happen. My father won't benefit from this but he led the way for someone else....perhaps me.