For Cendy Mendoza of Surprise, Arizona, caregiving began with small acts of support — repeating conversations, tracking appointments, and offering gentle reminders. But as dementia progressed in her loved one, those tasks evolved into something deeper and more emotionally complex. “It’s emotional work,” she shares, “watching someone you care for slowly lose parts of who they were.”

Cendy, a caregiver and healthcare professional with Heritage Home Care AZ, has walked a path filled with both heartbreak and unexpected grace. She describes the pain of being unrecognized by someone she loves, the frustration of watching logic and memory slip away, and the exhaustion that comes with constant vigilance. Yet, through it all, she’s discovered profound lessons in patience, compassion, and presence.

“Dementia has taught me to focus less on what’s been lost and more on what remains: love, dignity, and presence,” she writes. Cendy finds joy in the smallest moments: A smile, a shared laugh, a fleeting connection. These glimpses of emotional memory, even when cognitive memory fades, are what she cherishes most.

Her advice to fellow caregivers is both practical and deeply empathetic:

• Learn about the disease to better understand your loved one’s behavior.
• Focus on the person, not the illness. They still have emotions and dignity.
• Take care of yourself. “You can’t pour from an empty cup,” she reminds us.
• Celebrate small moments of connection. They matter more than you might realize.

The best advice Cendy received? “Meet them where they are.” Instead of correcting or reminding, she began accepting her loved one’s reality. That shift brought calm and comfort to both of them.

Cendy’s dedication and compassion were recently recognized when she was honored as the Mission Moment speaker at the Phoenix Walk to End Alzheimer’s. Her story moved thousands of attendees and served as a powerful reminder of the love and resilience found in caregiving.

She is also passionate about raising awareness. “Too many people still think dementia is just ‘memory loss,’” she says. “In reality, it affects every part of a person’s life, and their family’s, too.” She believes that understanding leads to compassion, support, and action - and that awareness is the first step toward change.

If you or someone you love is affected by Alzheimer’s or another form of dementia, you’re not alone. For caregiving resources, support, or guidance, visit alz.org/dsw or call the Alzheimer’s Association’s 24/7 Helpline at 800.272.3900.